Thursday, August 31, 2006

The frustrations which bring self loathing

So yesterday was possibly the worst I've ever felt. Let me first say is
now I really need this job more than anything. In saying that lets chat.
I had the DPS watching me yesterday which is one of many to come. I knew
nothing of her watching me but she came over as soon as I sent someone
away because they didn't have a place for a sticker on their cycle. So
she assumed that I gave him a sticker without a brake test. Anywho she
monitored me as I gave another inspection. Everything went superb except
when it came to the brake test. I know its partially my fault. I wasnlt
using the line I was supposed to. I had never seen any. So all this time
I had been giving "illegal' stickers out. So the DPS woman leaves and I
get on with my life. She comes back an hour or so later and tells me to
sign some shit and she's like "did they call you?" and I tell her no.
She leaves once more and I know I'm in deep shit, so I'm dreading the
call from Dave (my boss). Finally he calls and it gets me frustrated.
First off he kinda told me it was definitely my fault, about I should
have had sense to find the lines and shit. I got a write up so the DPS
lady could take away my license and also I caused the whole company to
get a write up. I finally get off the phone and I'm still feeling like
shit. So Dave told me before I got off with him to call every end of day
to tell him my car count and shit. I call at the end of day and tell him
all my information. Then I'm in trouble again, I should have rejected
cars because apparently it looks funny passing all the cars and secondly
I didn't sell anything. The whole not selling shit is my choice because
I don't know how to change a lightbulb or wipers. The whole not
rejecting someone is a whole different problem. I should have rejected 3
cars yesterday for their power steering fluid being low and the gascaps
being bad. Well here at the station most pay $15, 12.50 is for the
inspection and 2.50 is for fluid top offs free gascaps and shit. So I'm
left here to ponder how I'm supposed to fail someone who doesn't have
enough power steering fluid or a broken gascap when they paid the 2.50
extra to receive these items. Its stupid shit. So Dave is supposed to
come today and I know this shit isn't over. I don't know this job has me
thinking about things. I want to do something with my life. Maybe I
should go back to college but then I don't have any cash. I think I'm
definetely going to talk to the recruiter on friday.


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